Fischer
Speeches
Hook Your Audience!
Sample Speeches
Sample Anniversary speech
What could be better
than the love of two people newly married,
full of life, anticipation and joy?
Whose heart isn’t warmed by the sight
of two young lovers holding hands,
a sparkle in their eyes, a passion in their hearts?
Is there anything in the world more beautiful than new love?
Yes, there is—old love.
Darlene and I were married fifty years ago today
and I’d like to say that never has our love for each other
been as strong, faithful, and true as it is today.
You are still the love of my life Darlene
and we are still beautiful together…
[continues]
Sample Best Man Speech
While fans of the T.V. series “The X-Files” know
that ‘the truth is out there,’ long suffering fans of Robert’s love life
have believed that something else was out there
in the mysterious realm just beyond Robert’s perception.
That something or someone rather,
was Robert’s elusive future wife.
And now, can you believe it, here she is, Julia,
and she is wonderful.
Congratulations to both of you.
And shame on you Robert
because what are you going to do with us now – your avid fans
who have come to rely on your weekly episodes of strange,
twisted, angst-ridden dating experiences
that equally entertained us and comforted us
in the fact that at least our own love lives
were not as dramatic and unfortunate as your own…
[portion of speech omitted here]
…so Robert, don’t worry about us your fans—
truth be told,
we have always been rooting for you
and now we’re extremely happy and proud,
for a good man who has come a long way—
a great friend,
a best friend,
who finally fell in love with the girl of his dreams.
[continues]
Sample of a 9/11 Memorial Address
Dear friends,
we gather together today because there is a place in our hearts
that must never be diminished
- a vigil flame that must never blow out
- a reverence for life that must always be guarded,
cherished and renewed should we continue to be “citizens”
in the truest sense of the word
There are but a few calendar dates
eternally etched on the hearts of Americans
and 9/11 deserves to be among them.
Just as it is unthinkable
to let the sun set on the 4th day of July
without pausing to think
of the blessings of Life,
that our great country provides,
so too should the 11th day of this month
be observed as the day
that those same cherished values were attacked by others
who do not appreciate our outlook on life.
We must not let the night blanket this day
without first pausing
to remember all that was taken away
five years ago this morning ...
[continues]
Sample Athlete's hometown Hall of Fame induction speech
I am truly grateful for this honor.
I’m humbled by it as well
because I know that as I stand before you
this evening,
I am standing on the shoulders of many people
who have helped lift me up to this hour.
And so I’d like to thank the board
and the membership of the Hall of Fame,
all my coaches,
my teammates,
my Father Earl ...
[portion of speech omitted here]
...and all of you
who have taken time to be here
to celebrate with me the fact that our little town
is a great place to launch an amazing life journey.
I would never have guessed,
all those years ago,
swimming in the
or playing catch in the park not far from here,
that one day, a little farther down the river of life,
I would be standing here tonight
honored in this way.
But maybe I should have,
because this big honor, like all big honors,
this big event, like all big events,
is the result of all of the little events -
all the early mornings,
the setbacks,
the hurdles jumped,
all the little victories won
that add up like hard-fought rushes
to keep the chains moving
until finally you’re standing in the end-zone
with one hand on the pigskin
and the other pointing to the heavens ...
[continues]
Sample Retirement Roast for a Fun-Loving Executive
It has been said that some people
start their retirement long before they stop working
and I for one,
am not about to speculate
whether you fall into that category or not, Frank
I do want to apologize that it’s taken all these years
to finally throw you
this retirement dinner.
Better late than never, I guess
But now that your retirement is truly official
and you can enjoy the benefits of your leisurely lifestyle guilt-free,
(not to mention the big savings you’ll have
on Seniors Day at Shoppers Drug Mart),
I do want to extend our heartfelt congratulations to you
and, perhaps more importantly,
our sincerest condolences
to your wife Janet
Someone once said that the trouble with retirement
is that you never get a day off.
And I wouldn’t be surprised if it was the spouse of the one retiring
who said it.
Are you sure you’re ready for this Janet?
I mean, what are you going to do
now that Frank will be lounging away
the hours between 9 and 5,
not at the office
where he’s used to us carrying the weight of his work
but at home where I trust you don’t let him get away
with the same tricks ....
Sample Valentines Tea for a School Principal to Kindergarten kids and their parents
I want to give you a gift today –
the gift of love.
The trouble is
I don’t exactly know how to package it for you.
Does anyone know how to wrap up the gift of love?
It’s hard to do that isn’t it?
It’s as hard as telling someone what a rose smells like
or to describe a beautiful sunset we may have seen
or to share the feeling inside of us
the first time we tasted strawberry ice-cream.
It’s not easy talking about love –
you can’t quite paint a picture of it
or put it into words.
Love is slippery and sneaky in that way,
and it's always bigger than the words we have to describe it.
Love likes to surprise us – have you ever been surprised by love?
It surprises us in the most unexpected ways –
Just when we think we’re in for a gloomy time
love comes and gives us a great bear hug
in the morning, maybe, while we’re eating our cheerios,
or whispers something sweet in our ear while we’re waiting for the bus
or tickles our side as we help mom bake cookies.
Sometimes love can make us angry or sad too
because, like everything that is alive,
love has its seasons.
So sometimes love is in full bloom
like a happy sunflower telling the world
“Isn’t life great!”
But at other times,
love seems to be buried under a blanket of snow three feet deep
and we wonder if we’ll ever feel happy again.
But if there’s one thing I’ve learned about love,
it is to be patient and believe that it will come back
Love always comes back
Actually, love never really leaves us - ever
But we need to watch closely for it,
look for it, search for it,
not with these [point to your eyes]
but with this. [place your hands over your heart]
A famous writer of children’s stories once said
“…here is my secret, a very simple secret;
it is only with the heart that one sees rightly,
what is essential is invisible to the eye.”
If we want to receive love
we need to open our hearts to it
and the best way to open our heart to love is to kindly give away
to others the love we already have ...
[continues]
Sample Eulogy Speech
Speaking about a future paradise,
Woody Allen once quipped—
“The lion and the calf shall lie down together
but the calf won’t get much sleep!”
As we gather today to celebrate the life of my father
and to release him to a better place,
I can’t help but wonder how many nervous “calves”
there might be in heaven right about now.
Dad lived his life with unparalleled tenacity and gusto
and I suspect he’s taken those strong traits
with him beyond this life’s journey.
Heaven will never be the same.
Nor will we, for having known my father, Henry David.
I love Dad for so many reasons but if there’s one thing
I will always remember,
it’s that he taught me by his own example to live life to the fullest…
[continues]